Tuesday, February 19, 2008

The truth comes out

Ok, apparently I'm not good at pretending to lie, because I can't remember the stories I have told. All of you who remembered something about me being in a dryer were correct. Nobody got both, but partial credit goes to Mel, Jendeis, Emily, and of course Kate.

1. I used to have over 9 body piercings, but now only my ears are pierced.
Lies, all lies. I wasn't allowed to get my ears pierced until I was 13. I had two holes in each ear at one point, but that was about as wild as I got. It just seemed too painful to go along with my friends as they pierced tongues, eyebrows, noses, and er..."down there."

2. I once won a Star Trek creative writing competition
True. I was in 7th grade I think. The Indy library had a contest and I won my age category. I wrote part of it in Klingon, because that is just how geeky I was.

3.I have a tattoo of the word "also" on my back.
True. My best friend L and I have always said "I love you also" instead of "I love you too."
When somebody tells you they love you, too often we respond "I love you too" without thinking about it.
When we use also, we are saying that we have thought about it and we really mean it when we say "I love you." So we end every conversation by telling each other "also." She has the mirror image of the word on her back.

4. My middle name is Wilson.
False. My middle name is Celia. I did however take the Saint name of Thomas More when I was confirmed because I thought he seemed like a cool dude. The archbishop did not look impressed as he welcomed the bald-headed chick as "Thomas."

5. I've been inside a dryer while it was on.
True. Apparently I already told this story. Whoops. When I was in 5th grade I was playing hide and seek and chose to hide in the dryer, because I would climb in there when we had tornadoes.
(Looking back, I am slightly horrified that my mother thought this was a good place for me. I mean, would rescuers think to look in the dryer?) Anyways, I hid in the dryer with the door open and Nate P. came along and kicked it closed. Apparently the dryer was on and closing the door started it up. I wasn't in long before my mother heard me screaming and came running to let me out. I used my experience as an excuse for weird behavior for years to come.

6. I once dated a guy who thought I was British.
True. When I was nannying in NYC I was riding the subway and reading Sam Shepard's "Motel Chronicles." The guy sitting across from me asked me about it, I responded in a British accent (What? You don't walk around large cities trying on different characters?), he was cute, I was cute, he asked me out, I said yes.
Only problem was, how was I going to explain that in fact that whole accent thing was um, fake?
I never quite figured it out for the first date and that was really the only time I could have POSSIBLY gotten away with explaining and not have him run screaming. I was about to move to London, so I knew the relationship wasn't going to be more than three weeks anyways, so I never got around to telling him. I just broke his little heart after three weeks. He was all about continuing the relationship long-distance-style (after three weeks! Um, creepy) but for obvious reasons that wasn't going to work. Plus, he was shorter than me. And he probably liked my accent more than anything else.


  1. Io, I think I feel about you the way you feel about Kate. Want to come over for to my house for a cry and some vegan, wheat-free chocolate maple brownies? I think it'd be fun (or maybe "fun").

    And in response to your comment on my blog about hating women who get pregnant instantly - yes, I do hate them. What's worse is that 2 of those women are my beloved sisters, spawning my 3 gorgeous nephews, whom I love madly and hormonally. Damn.

  2. Woot! Go Kate! I almost said 1 and 4, but I tripped myself up with the tattoo/piercing connection.

    Super cool tattoo btw. And a very sweet story behind it.

    I suppose one of these days I will do this meme. I keep seeing it floating around, and I love memes, but I have to motivate myself, and I'm having a hard time with that lately.

  3. I'm in Saskatchewan, which is most likely a much longer trip for you, although I'm not sure where you are. It's pretty much bald prairie where I live, though, so the driving is fast around here - nothing but straight lines. You're welcome anytime. Plus I've always wanted a puppy.

    Blogging is SO great - in the last week, I think it has pretty much saved my life. Or maybe the lives of those around me, cause the urge to maim has been pretty powerful lately...

  4. ROFL, being stuck inside of a dryer sounds terrifying! Yikes. My best friend and I also have matching tattoos - so I thought that story was neat. ;)

  5. I won something? I never win anything, I mean this is just so unexpected, I don't know what to do!

    I don't know if you told the dryer story before, I just felt that it sounded like something you would do.

    Love the "also" explanation.

  6. Woo-hoo! I got at least ONE right! I really would have thought that you would have had 9 piercings at one time ... especially if you were bald-headed when you were confirmed. LOL! God ... wish I could have gotten away with that ...

  7. I love the "Thomas" story. I chortled out loud at that one. Thanks for adding a touch of levity to my day.

    You need to write short stories! I'm totally serious!

  8. Dang, you make me laugh. And thanks for your fast and plentiful comments - I'm a little comment whore at the moment, obsessively checking every few minutes once I post something new.

    The bad news is I don't live in Moose Jaw. The good news is two-fold: 1) I live in Regina (aka the city that rhymes with "fun") and 2) Moose Jaw is only half an hour away. My husband is from there, and his family all still live there, so I know the fun stuff to do. There's a spa with an outdoor, extra-hot, turn-you-lobster-red, pool. There's a store that sells about 50 flavours of fudge. There's underground tunnels rumoured to have been used by Al Capone. And let's not forget the giant moose statue. His jaw just got repaired last year (I am deadly serious), so he's looking great in photos these days.

    Oh. My. God. We would have so much fun. I'm just playing the film montage of our Moose Jaw invasion in my head.

    And how in hell do you know the Saskatchewan Pirates song? That is so random!

  9. I would have been so wrong. I haven't answered any of these blogs, but here is what I was going to say.

    1. true. I could see it.
    2. LIE!
    3. true. goes with #1.
    4. true. I thought you were trying to trick us with a lie.
    5. already knew to be true.
    6. Lie.

    See, I would have sucked. Heck, I do suck.

  10. Okay, I'm totally blown away by how cool your tat is. Haven't even seen it and I think it's one of the best ideas EVER.

    And have you gotten super-popular in the week I've been out of touch, or what??? You must be Hot Stuff, girl!

  11. I love love love that you were confirmed with a- a boy's name & b- a bald head. I was woefully wrong onmy guesses, but the stories were well worth it!

  12. in regard to your answer of mine ... i can't read tone in typing, so are you being sarcastic or serious?