- Comment on blogs
- Read trashy and not so trashy novels
- Watch films that nobody else has seen or likely will ever see
- Play with my animals
- Listen to my husband bitch about most of the above
- Annoy my husband with incessant kisses while he watches basketball to get him back for the bitching
- Help my mom keep from divorcing or dismembering my dad.
My dad has three loves in his life other than his family. He loves the Cathol*c Church, the St. Lou*s Cardinals, and stamps.
I couldn't in good conscience take a picture of my dad's two rooms. Somebody would probably see the picture and call child protective services to warn them that my future children should not be allowed near this deranged man.
There are boxes and piles of stamps filling every corner of both rooms. It's like those Oprah shows with hoarders, only instead of going to the mall or watching QVC, my dad goes to stamp shows and orders off of eb@y and from private collectors.
My mom, seeing her future, has decided it is time to work towards not having to bury my dad's body under her apple tree. He is a large man after all.
I have been going over to my parents' house every week the past few months to help sort my dad's stamps. We're halfway through one room, but progress is stymied by my dad
A. Refusing to let us throw anything away. That L*nn's Stamp News from 1992? He might need to read it again.
B. Taking boxes we have sorted and mixing them together again. Clearly, whatever we were doing was incorrect so he apparently thinks we should stat from scratch.
C. Pretending to help sort, but instead sitting and exclaiming over stamps (Oh hey! This is a good stamp block! Let me tell you all about it!) and then sorting the pile I gave him into one pile. Which, in case you're wondering, is not sorting at all.
D. LAUGHING when my mother yells at him for one of the above.
The saddest part of all this is that despite my father's best efforts, none of his kids ever got into stamp collecting. Or the church for that matter. I am a Cards fan though, as is A.
This does not mean he's given up though - just as he tried to remind me that it would be nice if I came back to the church before I have kids (Ha! Little does he know. Plus, the church doesn't approve of the way in which I plan to have kids.) he jumps on any interest I show in a stamp.
Some of them are pretty cool - there seems to be a stamp for damn near anything you can think of except of course for infertility. (There is a really neat Portuguese stamp, but my dad collects US only.)
Today I got a few to take home.You can't really see them from my crappy picture, but he gave A a current Civil Rights Pioneers sheet and I took some Labor Unions and some Collective Bargaining stamps home.
I love the Collective Bargaining stamp - you can totally tell it's from the 1970s too. It says "out of conflict...accord."
Unfortunately, most of the other 4,999,999,999 stamps hold little interest for me. Sorry dad.