Tuesday, July 10, 2012


Al gave me the trigger shot yesterday, which was not too bad. (I had the idea doing a muscle shot instead of a SubQ would be a million times more painful, but it really wasn't. I am hoping that the PIO surprises me in a similar manner.) A got home right before he was supposed to inject me, so I got it all prepped and explained what he needed to do.
So, first I tell him to make sure it's all the way up, no air bubbles. Of course, he doesn't brace his fingers properly, just pushes on the syringe as I am telling him to be careful, and sends a tiny squirt up. No big deal, we're doing 10,000 units, it's 95% still there. I tell myself to calm the fuck down.
He does the shot while I talk to him and it's not too bad.
Then this morning I decided to pee on a stick just to make sure that the HCG shot wasn't made of water or something. (And you know...it might be the only time my pee will ever light up a second line. Opportunity not to be missed.)

And nothing. No second line.

This would be the point at which I lost my motherfucking mind.

I asked A about doing the shot and apparently he didn't pull the *plunger* back to check for blood and make sure he hadn't hit a vein. He pulled the *needle* back. A is smart, he really is, but WTF? I was angry at myself for not explaining better, angry at him for not being logical and reading directions, for running late, for not being obsessive and watching videos in advance...at 7:30am I was panicking and pissed. What if he hit a vein and so the HCG shot just...I don't know, whatever HCG shots do when you hit a vein that involves them not triggering you properly for IVF and thus wasting all the money you saved up and squandering your only shot at having a biological child...?!
I ran out to the store, bought another test (the first one was a cheapo that came in a pack of 25 so I could be obsessive as I approached the beta) and peed on it.

And nothing. No second line.

I paged the nurse, then looked at the stick again and there was a second line.Apparently they aren't kidding about waiting more than two seconds after the pee reaches the test area to lose your shit.

The nurse called and laughed and said we are fine.

Edit: No worries, I am feeling okay now, but this morning my brain was on overdrive. Can I blame lupron *withdrawal* for finally going lupron crazy?


  1. Take a deep breath there, cowboy! I know this stuff is stressful, but try not to drive yourself crazy. Hope the retrieval goes well!

  2. I think all hpt's should now read "wait more than 2 seconds to read & freak the f*@# out".
    Approaching the really exciting times now- have you considered acupuncture at all? I went for my iui cycle and if nothing else it may give you some calm relaxing time.

  3. I wish I could send you some zen! I know it's stressful.

    I'll bet if you hit a vein it still works. I'll bet as long as it's in your blood stream, you're golden. My trigger was always subq, in the belly. But, I'm certain we hit veins a bunch of times with the PIO. And I would say the PIO is not too bad, but I was slap happy to stop it after 10 weeks! I also had to do blood thinners for my entire pregnancy, and those were a stinging, burning bitch!

  4. YESSS. Nothing like a good freak out when you're hopped up on hormones. ;)

  5. Wishing you lots of perfectly formed eggs!

  6. SO glad you are feeling better! It is crazy what those hormones can do to you. Sending good thoughts your way.

  7. Ack, that would stress me out too. Of course, you'd think every infertile would know how to pee on an hpt, but how to read a positive test - that's a whole different ball game :).